Saturday, April 16, 2011

January 10, 2011 - A New Job


I got laid off from my job yesterday.  The boss came in and said, “You know, you’re hurting yourself working this way.  You’re in pain and you keep pushing.  It isn’t good for you and it doesn’t work this way.”

But today I was offered a new job.  I think this one must be a better fit.  I showed up for work, I don’t even know what the job is, but oddly enough I felt perfectly prepared, like I’d done everything I needed to do to get ready.   I’ve never felt this way before.  I was always a bit worried that I didn’t know enough, wasn’t good enough, had some hidden faults that were bound to come up and ruin my work.  But now I feel only absolute confidence, clarity and strength, resting in a bubbling pool of joy.

It appears that all I’m asked to do is to show up and let the delicious vibration moving through my being tell me what to do.  There is nothing to know, nothing I need to plan or understand, just to allow all that I am to flow into that vibration.  I watch in wonder.  “What is this work and what is it we’re building?”  I guess I’ll wait and see.

On top of the new job, my husband seems to have left.  Where once there was this person that I watched, waiting to see which way I should move, feeling my way around his fears and desires, there is only empty space and all that looks back at me is love.

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